How to Pleasure a Woman: Giving Oral Sex

A study revealed that women in heterosexual relationships are four times more likely to say that sex wasn't pleasurable in the past year, while men have 20% to 50% more orgasms as their female partners.

This got us thinking: If we’ve never been properly educated about female anatomy and pleasure, chances are men haven’t been either. And just as we might find it hard to ask questions and have these conversations, so might they.

So, with that in mind, we’re continuing our How to Pleasure a Woman series with five tips focused on oral sex. 

1. Familiarize yourself with the anatomy of the vulva.

Begin by learning the different parts that make up the female external genitalia. Getting to know the vulva better will help you know where everything is located and better navigate the landscape.

2. Foreplay: Start slow.

There are thousands of nerve endings in the glans of the clitoris, which can make it very sensitive to touch for some women. Instead of going straight for it, start elsewhere.

For example, you could start by rubbing your partner’s vulva, even over her clothing or underwear before she's underdressed fully. Or you could start by caressing her inner thighs or sucking her nipples to get her aroused.

Once you get to the vulva, you can use your tongue to tease the area around the clitoris, licking the labia and coming close to the clitoris. Slowly build up contact and pressure and look for her reactions.

3. Learn how to use your tongue.

The flat of the tongue is ideal for initial teasing or stimulation, because it can cover a large area. Instead of flapping the tongue around, you can try keeping it stationary and moving your head instead. That way, you can move back and forth over the genital area as her arousal builds.

Use the tip of your tongue to lick tiny circles over the clitoral hood. You can use your fingers to gently pull the hood upward so you can focus the tip of your tongue on the clit. Start with light pressure and speed and gradually ramp things up.

4. Listen to your partner’s cues.

Every vulva is different, just like every woman is different, so take your time understanding what your partner’s body is trying to tell you. Her sounds and movements will let you know how she feels about what you’re doing, but you can also ask for feedback or even guidance. Find her sensitive parts, tease her, massage her, and enjoy giving her pleasure.

5. Take your time.

It takes men an average of 5 to 6 minutes to reach orgasm, but it can take women twice as long, so don’t panic if you feel like you’ve been hanging down there for a while. Showing her that you're enjoying it will increase her arousal.

Sucking a clitoris is often the best way to get a woman to climax. Cover the clitoral area with your mouth and suck, forming a seal. Continue sucking while you lick the clitoris, and it will most likely end with an orgasm.

A Final Note

All women are different, so this series is only meant to give you some broad guidance. The golden rule is to open up communication with your partner and ask her what she likes and enjoys most.

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