10 Foreplay Tips to Inspire Your Next Intimate Moment

Sex

At its core, foreplay is an expression of desire and vulnerability. It’s a space that allows for exploration, discovery, and a deeper connection.

Man and woman kissing.

Foreplay really starts after your last sexual encounter. It's a way to keep the sexual energy alive between you and your partner between the last and next time you have sex.

This includes the way you look at each other, touch each other, and talk to each other outside the bedroom. Foreplay keeps you connected and builds up to the next time you're sexually intimate.

Did You Know?
When a sexual encounter lasts for fifteen minutes or longer, there is a higher likelihood that a woman will orgasm. 

The Importance of Foreplay

Depending on what research you look at, it can take women between 18 and 45 minutes to get fully aroused.

A fully aroused woman is more likely to be wet, experience heightened pleasure, and reach climax during penetrative intercourse. This means that the longer you spend having sex (foreplay, intercourse, or both), the more likely you are to experience deeper levels of pleasure. 

Here are 10 ideas to inspire your next sexual session. 

  1. Communication first.
    Share your desires and boundaries openly to set the stage for a comfortable and exciting experience. Try out Emily Nagoski’s Yes, No, Maybe tool to find new ways to play.
  2. Set the mood.
    Dim the lights, play soft music, and create an inviting atmosphere to enhance the intimacy.
  3. Explore erogenous zones.
    Focus on sensitive areas like the neck, ears, inner thighs, and back for heightened sensations. You can add a lube to elevate this experience. 
  4. Tease and build excitement.
    Playful touches and whispered promises can help build anticipation and ignite desire. If you’re feeling adventurous, experiment with using a pleasure product. 
  5. Slow it down.
    Take your time with each touch and caress, and enjoy the intimacy.
  6. Use your breath.
    Gently breathing on sensitive areas can send shivers down your partner's spine.
  7. Exchange massages.
    Offer a sensual massage using scented oils to relax and connect. Try out pleasure mapping.
  8. Introduce props.
    Incorporate different fabrics and textures and/or pleasure products to add an element of surprise and novelty.
  9. Switch up the rhythm.
    Alternate between soft and intense touches to keep the sensations fresh.
  10. Explore new locations.
    Change the setting to keep things exciting and different from your routine.

Redefining Foreplay

Sex and relationship experts have been encouraging the reframing of foreplay as “coreplay” – play that is core or crucial to your sexual experience. 

If sex lasts on average about 7 to 13 minutes, but it takes the female genitals anywhere between 18 and 45 minutes to actually be ready for penetration, you can see that there is a significant gap there. Being penetrated before your body is ready can cause irritation, pain, and numbness. The solution, according to sexologist and tantra practitioner Tugce Balik, is to incorporate more coreplay, thereby prolonging sex and getting your body ready for penetration.  

It’s important to also note that, whether you call it foreplay or coreplay, you can also just think of it as “sex”. Oral sex, non-penetrative sex, and mutual masturbation, for example, are all just different types of sex. The term is not only reserved for penetrative, penis-in-vagina sex. As always, we invite you to define what sex means to you

Remember

Foreplay in and of itself can be an amazing sexual experience without leading up to orgasm or penetration. It's totally okay to stop after foreplay and have that be enough.

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illustration of three different women.